They always say that it is the small things in life that make the biggest changes.. One good pasting from my mother when I was a child ensured that I would never lie! A good morning greeting to a professor walking his dog in Wales, ensured that I (a non-swimmer) would practice swimming until I became a surf lifeguard three months later.
It is these small events that shape us and mould us into who we are. But it is up to us to listen and learn from these small events, or to ignore them with the rest of the noise.
In this last week, I learnt a valuable lesson in humility. I’ve always taken pride in my upbringing rooted in the humble beginnings of our family. While my grandparents were well off, my parents with their blessings started out on their own – building the company and the family brick by brick. So I’ve always been grounded in reality to a large extent.
But all this is relative right? Last week, I went for Anuradha & Vikas Kasliwal’s daughter’s wedding. At the wedding of course, were Neerja and Kumar Mangalam Birla. Neerja is from the Kasliwal family, and they were all there for the family event.
Now for those of you who don’t know, Kumar heads the Aditya Birla group.You can read more about him here.
His mother, Rajshri Birlaji is the epitomy of grace, humility and class, and his wife, Neerja follows in her footsteps.
While at the wedding, there were always people around the three of them – wishing them, talking to them, so I did not want to interrupt. I was standing with some friends and talking when I turned to see Rajshriji pouring herself a glass of water. This is the Taj. There’s a waiter for each person at the event. If I wanted to get a glass of anything, I would have just motioned to a waiter and asked for whatever my throat desired. And here was Mrs. Birla pouring herself a glass of water… And – she turns and with motherly affection asks “Hemanth, can I pour you a glass of water?”.
They’ve done it again. Again the Birla family has won me over.. I would have picked up the glass and poured it for Rajshriji, not because of who she is, but because she is a dear friend of the family, and being an elder, its just the normal thing to do. But here she is asking me, a youngster if she could pour me a glass?!
Later, as I pass by, Neerja and Kumar at separate times, they turn to me and ask me how I’m doing. My point here is not to say – Wow, look at Hemanth! What a dude! My point is – the Birla’s – Rajshriji, Kumar, Neerja – would do this for anyone. That is how they have been raised – with utmost humility with a personal touch.
Kumar asked me to join him and his mother as he had a small snack at the wedding and asked me about work, my family and how my sister is doing. These are the small things that I was talking about – where a small gesture like asking a simple question, or offering a glass of water can win a person over for life. Its taking that one extra step – of genuine concern that win’s people over to them.
This is one family with which people should not have envy … only complete admiration.
– x –
I was back at the Taj Mahal hotel again on 22nd Nov 2005 for a dinner hosted by Harsh and Mala Goenka for their son Anant’s wedding to Radha. At the wedding was probably 90% of corporate and art India. As both Harsh uncle and Mala aunty have wide interests, their friends also come from all walks of life.
My sister came in a little late as she had to go to another wedding dinner on the other side of town. So when she came in, I went down to escort her from the lobby to the function at the Crystal Room.
As she enters she asks me – “Ask me who just walked out..” I ask who. She says “Ratan Tata”. She proceeds to tell me about how Ratan Tata, the Chairman of the Tata group (owners of the Taj Mahal hotel) walks out of the Taj, to his car.. No no.. Not his car that been driven up by a valet. But his car that is parked somewhere.
A white Honda City.
Yes, Ratan Tata got into his Honda City – not the present model, but the previous model and DROVE. No driver – he drove himself home.
When I see how these two Chairmans of the Fortune 500 Tata and Birla empires have come up – from the days when my sister and me would hope that they would hold their family empire’s flag high – I’m filled with happiness and pride. They have both surpassed everyone’s expectations. And they have done it by remaining humble.
And it is by the small things that they do, that they have become the biggest in what they do.
A true lesson in class… and humility